Rusty doors open with a crank
A soul walks in
Two violinists and a puppet
A coin is dropped
and puppet comes to life
Break for freedom
and a doll for prize
A coin is dropped
and a hat filled with candies
Two violins are crossed
and a train ride
with no one else on it
A coin is dropped
and balls are passed
One stretch
and glass is shattered
One more stretch
and some more
A black drop trickles
down the cheek
And the doll is dropped
beside the ballerina shoes
80 comments:
See this is what I meant when I said you can do so much better! Am glad you're back to being your awesome self:D
Loved your personal carnival of rust! I can visualize the entire scene in my mind's eye...Simply fantastic:-)
Perfect picture for that perefct post:D
chahta kya hai yaar??
chawanni athanni?? doll?? or sme stretching?? :P
inspiration kaun hai?/ miss K?? :p
My fav lines:
A coin is dropped
and puppet comes to life
Break for freedom
and a doll for prize
wah, wah...is poem main drama, emotion, tragedy, irony...sab kuch hai ...It's fantastic!!
You have a dark side. I know it! You leave witty comments on everyone's blog and somehow when you start writing on your own one, your andar ka Mogambo comes to life. :P
Hmmmm... darkly delicious. My onveractive imagination went on overdrive with the imageries.
And yet.. reminded me of this beggar girl and man who I once saw performing at a railway station. The look in her eyes... as if nothing mattered anymore. No child should look like that!
dark n sad yet so marvellous!!!
its an amazing read again, and it depicts the emotions so very well... :)
y dont u write often re???
Cheers!!!
wowwwww..
tat was dark n deliciously spine-chilling.. ya should pen lyrics for a death metal band :)
they'd die for ya lyrics..
i urge ya 2 pen poems more often- they have a ghastly innocence hiding mehind the ghost..
"a black drop trickles down the cheek, and the doll is dropped beside the ballerina shoes"- wowwwwww, it reminds me of kajal streaming down a malnourished child's face, and her glittery dreams shatter just like that coin dropping..
awesummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm :)
p.s.
n thanks for helping me access ya page, i dun even know what version i use..
n yeh, i'm technically retarded..
n yeh, i sell technical stuff for a livin :(
now,, tut-tut- dun laugh!!
Is this a horror movie?
Bhai, I guess I don't need to say how much I loved this one.
Honestly this is one blog where since the time I've started reading it, I've loved all the newly born posts!
What a symbolic shot with every element used over here.
I can so visualize the entire scene line by line, and so want to project it through lenses. ;)
Hats off Saar! I'm working for a script for a short movie. Lets see how it finalizes. But you can surely be of great help. :D
And yeh Johnny Depp bhaiya toh aur perfect lag rahe hain with the post. Add marta hun aapko kisi samajik vartalaap karne ki website pe. :P
hmm...nice poem!!..[nice blog!:)]...[u a depp fan?]
ladke seriously good stuff...
hey one question, is this symbolic of somebody, don't really think so. But what were yo thinking about or experiencing when you wrote this. The bigger picture?, the source?, the reason of existence of the piece or rather the reason the post cam to life?
Crazy:
Thanks. And I told you that time also, that was something which I wrote when I was in the mood of writing something but not a story or a poem, this one's a deliberate attempt. And I'm glad that you liked it :D
Gunj:
Abbe aise hi bakwas hai, load kyon leti hai....and grrrr for Miss K, tu apne Miss K aur Mr N apne paas hi rakh !
Akshay:
Shukriya sir :)
Quarterpastseven:
LOL @ andar ka mogambo....bharat choot gaya par yahan ki movies abhi tak nahi chooti :P
I love dark poetry :)
Macadamia:
Thanks, I'm glad that you liked it. And yes, its all in her eyes :)
Ankur:
Samay ka abhaav sirji...dhanyavad, aapko pasand aayi :)
Rantravereflect:
Thanks, good to know that you like such kind of stuff. I usually used to write on similar lines but life has become hectic lately :|
And as for the webpage, no problems at all. You sell technical stuff, great...what do you sell :D
Solitaire:
Just a prelude :P
Sutta:
Dhanyavaad gurudev, kabhi kuch banayen to bataiyega zaroor ! Aur aapka to koi nimantran aaya nahi hai abhi tak, mein hi bhej dunga.
All the best for your short film :D
Brocasarea:
Thanks and welcome. And I'm not some specific actor/actress fan, I'm movies fan and I liked this one :)
Chacha:
Thanks chachaa. Par ye sirf bakar hai, it doesn't symbolize anything, pure crap :D
Abhi itne serious, ya aise emotions wale din nahi aaye hain ...
Bharat ki movies aur bharat ka music koi mujhse nahi door kar sakta! Kabhi nahi!
I love the imagery in this one. It suits your template quite well.
neat man.....too good!!!
good post and uber cool blog
i sell HP notebooks, desktops, workstations, IPAQs, thin clients :)
thats eerie! :-/
ur template arouses curiosity...more like the poem!
Quarterpastseven:
Good to know lady :)
Alok:
Thanks man :)
Anvita:
Thanks :)
Ashu:
Thanks and welcome :)
Rantravereflect:
Hey! Are you in HP's Chennai branch ??
Pri:
Mission Accomplished :P
Wildflower:
Darkness is enticing ! Thanks and welcome !
A coin is dropped
and puppet comes to life
Break for freedom
and a doll for prize
sir..this was awesum!!!! I simply loved it..!!
Samby
firstly..abbe tu itti jaldi jaldi kaise updat karne lag gaya posts??
secondlyy... yaar kya vreative imagination hai..i mean how can you think like that unless u are in that situation ...main to agar to hilaane waali movie dekh loon tab kuch aisa sochun.. per sacchi bolun..mujhe samajh ni aaya.. per likha kiss intention se hai?
ohh ladke tabhi tu thik hai fir...
and one more point, it is not required to go through all the emotions(read miseries) to write about them, you are creative then, creative, poet and writer in true sense then...
A puppet silent, in the dusty stall
The only life at the carnival
The only noise; the winds of change
Everything is mute since the day they came
The laughter echoes now in memory
Emptiness a reminder of what had been
On wooden legs the puppet wakes
In forlorn hopes of another day
@beauty and the beast: good one
Samby:
Thanks man, thanks for dropping by !
Geet:
Oye mein jaldi ni update karne lag gaya, tu busy ho gayi hai aajkal...aur sochne ke kya hai yaar...ye creativity kuch nahi hoti, thodi si dope maaro aur sab Shakespeare ho jaate hain :P
Bus aise hi likh di, koi intention ya logic nahi hai !!
Chacha:
Ab choke mat lo !!
Beauty and the beast:
Buried under the webs of time
Choked of life by hands of fate
In the dusty stalls of fare
Still glimmers a ray of hope
Thanks for dropping by :)
You are tagged. At my blog :)
Of hopes and dreams and crystal balls
I dare not speak, lest a curse befall
Turning me into a heap of dust
Much before I have time to rust
Sorry Couldnt resist myself!!:(
You really do write awesome poetry!!
P.S. Thanks Chacha!
busy to dost mein ho gayi hun... agar busy na rakhun to dimaag faaltu mein kuch bhi soch-ta hai...
per teri posts appan visit karte rahenge :)
"thodi si dope maaro aur sab Shakespeare ho jaate hain"
yeh Sid bahi bol rahe hai ?? haha ..
"Sounds like a rocking guy".. somebody said for you, thought I should pass on the compliment
Just because I never said I'm your fan, just because I never said you sound like a rocking guy, doesn't mean I don't think so!
And just because I didn't say so you don't visit my blog any more:-( That's not fair buddy!!!
Quarterpastseven:
Honoured! Will check it out :)
Beauty and the beast:
You die every minute
to live with this pain
Shadow of fear
is the devil's gain
Have faith as
sun will shine again
This place has always been an open forum, so always welcome :)
And thanks for the compliment, so do you !
Geet:
I know what you mean..stay busy and have fun :)
But saanu bhul na jaavi :P
Chacha:
Sachaai boli hai chacha....apne yahan ke Devdas aur Ataullah Khan aise daru aur dope ki hi to paidaish hain ;)
Aue ye compliment to aapko shabdon ka jaadu hai jiske liye mein aapka tahedil se shukrguzar hun :P
Waise bhejne wale ka bhi shukriya :D
Crazy:
Agar to ye mazak hai, to 'Bad Joke' aur agar ye seriously likha gaya hai to 'WTF!'.
Tujhe maine apna logic samjhaya to hua hai nanu janu :P
Good stuff here...
been blogging after long and happy to see no stories :P pliss don't attempt stories no more :P :)
Happy blogging!
Hello, hello, @Krazzy: kya ho gaya hai...???
@GoneCase:haha, daaru ko itna bhi ilzaam mat de, hai buri cheez accepted, lekin Devdas aur Ataullah Khan pehle bhi to bante hi honge.. kyu??
kair le ek aur... appreciate kar pao to...
Saahilon pe rahne waale kabhi toofano se nahi ladte..
Har roz dil lagaane waale kabhi maikhaano se nahi darte..
Skeety:
Thanks.
Chacha:
Maine kabhi daaru pe ilzaam nahi lagaya, ye sab to daaru aur ladki ka deadly combo hai jiski baat kar raha hun....
ये जो पीने पिलाने की बात करते हैँ!उनसे कह दो कभी हम भी पीया करते थेँ!
जितनी पीकर ये बहक जाते हैँ
उतनी हम गिलास मेँ छोड दिया करते थे.
wah wah ladke
appreciate kiya tune.. jawaab bhi solid sadak chaaap diya... haha
lekin saale
khuda ka khauf khao,sar-e-aam jhooth naa bolo, kaun sa glaas? kaun si brand? kaun sa pub? kaun si daaru.. facts dost??
"daaru aur ladki ka deadly combo"... yaad aa gaya kuchch.. haha
na oye.. aidaan kiddan bhul jawaangi tuhaanu... kiddan di gallan karde ho yaar.. chat te taan fadd hi lena aa appan..:)
freaky!
but I love the pic and the way u've written this post.
Keshi.
brilliant stuff ! love the pic.. scary.. he he.. reminds me of the RING...
and is that johnny depp in the background on ur blog ?
Kya shayari hai wah! :D
And do they really pay if one puts adds on their blogs? :P
Aapke phone mein Kaam-era hai?
Wah wah! :P
Chacha:
Bus chacha, tumne kya socha ki 2-4 angrezi ki line kya chaap li, haryana wale nahi rahenge, hehehe.
Baaki baat ko baat hi rehne de, sachai kitni hai kis baat mein, ye tumhe pehle hi pata hai !
Aur deadly combo se yaad....**ithaaaa ????
Geet:
Aa gal vadhiya kitti tu...saabaass !!
Keshi:
Hey, thanks :)
Emaan:
Thanks and welcome :)
And yep, that's Johnny Depp in Sweeney Todd's avataar !!
Sutta:
Shukriya shukriya ... and they don't pay for putting up ads, they'll pay if someone clicks on them so please do the needful :P
Aur kaam-era bilkul hai sahab....par ek DSLR ki tammanna hai, thodi si gareebi chayi hai bus !!
haai ram..yeh sabhi ko samajh aayi yaar sirf mujhe nahi hai :(
kuch lines aayi samajh mein wich were scary..my prognosis is comfirmed..i suffer from dyslexia. And the pic..woa!
@satanic angel : yaar check mah comment.. mujhe bhi kuch ni smajh ayaa.. am feeling better after reading your comment :P
nahi bey **ithaaaa nahi.. tu bhool gaya shayad...
loved the eerie drama...am blogrolling you...
loved the eerie drama...am blogrolling you...
Satanic Angel:
Oye tu tension kyon leti hai, mujhe hi samajh nahi aaya ki kya likh diya, sabne apni apni interpretation lagayi hogi, hehehe :D
Geet:
lol vi lol :P
Skeptic Saint:
Thanks for the honour :)
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